Another Lisbon trip has come to an end, today is my last day in this hilly coastal city. This time it has been my harbor to escape from the ridiculously cold weather in the Netherlands. On Instagram, I have seen frozen canals and my grandma said it was too cold that cannot be good, she never says it’s too cold.
Three weeks time flies by … We had quite some adventures this time.
Beyond the adventures, this city gives me the balance and break that I need from my structured Dutch lifestyle. I don’t have anything against a perfectly planned out life, in fact, I dig it. Knowing what I am up to and why gives me comfort, it has always been this way.
When I was a little younger, during breakfast, I would ask what we would have for dinner. My mom, dad or one of my grandmothers (I lived a bit everywhere, was a blast) would give an answer. Often, my dad would say I don’t know, my grandmother’s had the week planned out so their answer was ready but with my mom it was a bit more tricky. She would say a dish but sometimes by the end of the day when we both got home, either due to logistics or change of her mind, we would eat something else. You have no idea how that flipped me out. While I was completely prepared to eat let’s say chicken and vegetables, she would have filled paprikas and a salad. Look I love both and I am always grateful for the food they put on the table; they always fed me well, a bit too well some might say. But, my brain was not prepared for it. Thank god she knows how to handle me in any state but those situations were no fun.
This was just a tiny example of how I like my life organized. I will admit, it is hella exhausting. Hence, Lisbon teaches me how to be patient and ready for the unorganized.
Talking about unorganized, before coming here, every travelling soul’s biggest fear happened. Now thinking about it I am laughing but 30 hours before my flight to Lisbon mid February, I realized that I booked the wrong flight. Instead of booking Amsterdam – Lisbon, I had booked Lisbon – Amsterdam.
Apparently, I completely messed up my route settings when booking these flights eight weeks ago. Well now 11 weeks ago, a very neat move.
The moment I realized it, I was in the office and a heat wave came down my neck, the sudden panic kicked in hard.
You know the panic infused with shock at your own stupidity and taken unawares, exactly that. I scratched my forehead, told it to the audience I had, and called the flight agency.
They helped me in a very friendly way, updated my flights and flushed down more money down the drain but I had the new flights.
One compromise due to monetary reasons, the date of my return flight had to be changed to three days later. It was not Wednesday instead of Sunday. Normally, I would love staying longer but this time I had the construction workers coming on Monday to fix the pipelines. My brain’s reaction at that point was “fuck, shit, why, argh”. Thank god, a good uni friend of mine who shall remain nameless (for now) after laughing on the phone and comforting me about that it happens to all of us, came to rescue and said she would take care of things. She always saves my ass, no joke. Thank you if you are reading this! All the gods prophets and saints bless her! AMEN! … Yes I just told spiritually “higher” beings what to do #noshame
See the thing is despite the fact that I want to keep control over everything, and I claim to have it under control, I don’t have jack shit under control and as you can read I don’t have an overview on anything. For me to even dare to think of I could control things…
This whole situation is I think, something about the universe trying to teach me a lesson on letting things go …
Anywho, with all the last minute panic and sweating in a tiny cubicle without a sound isolation, trying to solve the mess I created by simply not paying attention, we had a plan, it is a half baked one but it still was a plan!
Thank god, all went surprisingly fast and good on Monday with the pipelines and she asked whether it was okay for her to hang out at my place as it was calming to her. Reading that text put a big smile on my face, I said of course anytime! She doesn’t even have to ask, she is family I thought and realized, I missed home.
While Lisbon is my home away from home just like Antalya because of the loved ones living in them, my harbor (literally and metaphorically) had become Rotterdam.
It has been a year since I moved to Rotterdam and my home became my stronghold.
Whatever happens happens, in the end, I will return here… for now I mean … I am stuck with it for 30 years anyway…
Despite all the madness that may come my way, when I enter my house, I feel calm, safe, and grateful.
Being grateful has always been the one motivator to push forward more and see all the shit storms through. My mom and dad one way or another busted their asses to get me educated and I will eternally be grateful, for that I cannot quit, I must cherish them and progressively build on everything they gave me. While doing so, going to enjoy my life to its maximum be it in Lisbon, Rotterdam, or wherever!
Okay need to go to the airport now, till next time bye!